again and again like a depressive merry go round

this is an odd juncture in my life that i never fail to find myself at from time to time. Its like an odd bout of merry go round at the carnival that does not seem to end. As though the operator has been bribed and he seems bent on watching me as I hurl from the each repeating round until i fall, knocked to the ground from the exhaustion.. slipping into the quiet unknown as his laughter fills the airs and clouds my death.