it rains...

In the event of preparin to rush to school, the heavens decide that now is a good time to water all earthy objects. Now, torrent thunders and dark gloomy skies mimic my present state of mind.. and i am forced to wonder if God really does read minds.. mine in particular. Nothin can be more dramatic then not feelin ur very best, and having the skies ard u repeat that, as though u were an open book for all to read and humor.

each tear i cry falls crashin to the undeserving ground beneath
just as rain drops fall from the heavenly skies to humor my very being

mock me, thats fine.. i thrive on ur very desire to hurt me. the rains often proclaim the arrival of a good and prosperous times. feedin the earth, floodin the water cravin rivers. bathin the heat off sweat laden bods, cleasin the soul, rejuvenatin the spirits. that i may breathe again. Though as i sit in the comforts of my room, i feel the stiffling humidity that the rains bring today. And i wonder why tis is i feel this way. Is it cos i hold back now, fearful of the emotions that will flood me shld i release myself. that my mind is plagued with thoughts i have no answers to. that i keep them behind this wall of brick and stone, willin to carry this burden rather then make sense of it all.

hmmmph.. i think so..

i guess should i try to comtemplate wad happened, it will dawn upon me the milllionth time i've let it disrupt me. so while i hold back, prayin not to forget those vivid memories stored in the fore grounds of my mind. I feel the dampness of the rains rather than its freshness... I shall let u mock me... i shall let u mock me